Thursday Evening Football - CSC Sports
(F.B.T., Captain: Sukhum, Holy Angels Field)

CSC Weather Line: 612-929-9333 x3 (League Webpage - Click Here)

(from Billy) It was a beautiful spring night, 60 degrees, a few wispy clouds in the sky, the perfect night for a walk in a drainage ditch....and the perfect night for our first indoor football game at Holy Angels. After months of broomball, working, eating, sunning and not playing football, we looked a little lost on defense. No need to name any names, but there were more problems with "cushion" than in my '91 Accord. Despite the shaky start, we got it together and didn't allow them to score on their initial drive. They were able to get a stop as well on our opening drive. After another first down, we stopped them again and it was looking like a real defensive battle.

Whoa, Colonel, that's when Craig (a.k.a. "QB") ordered up a veritable 12 piece platter Plus $2 of quality offensive football. (Fortunately, he had far more success than Pat's literal Plus $2 order later on.) Plus 2 might need to be our new team motto as we actually converted a number of conversions!

Pam was clearly the Most Vulnerable Person out there but did have some nice sticky finger grabs and a long TD toss earning herself the MVP award. Steph got recruited after some nice catches and only one knee slide. Keith utilized his full wingspan to haul in a couple TDs and extra points, one after reacting to a tipped pass (which kind of made up for running to the 5 yard line as the featured receiver on 4th down on our first drive.) Craig put a little extra gravy on the potatoes for his classic deep ball to Pat who dove to make the grab, (which apparently dirtied his hands enough to cause him to budge past another gentlemen in line into one person bathroom that was in use at the time.) Shon impressed the fans with his play earning many cheers of "Go daddy!" Bic clamped down on D after some "advice" from Pat and helped ensure our first shutout in a while. Bill seemed to be running spaghetti even when Craig was calling plays, sometimes going right, sometimes left, but usually wrong. (Maybe it's not Pat or Bic with ADHDTV, but Bill - hey, pass the Mike 'N Ikes!) Ultimately, it didn't matter. We had a fun time for our first game back, scored some TDs, shut out our opponents, and topped the night off with some DQ.

(from Salty) We took to the field on a cold night when spring ceded to winter, but no matter thanks to the loving bubble above. Bic set the tone of the game early with an amazing over-the-shoulder grab for a long TD. Pam answered the call when we needed a female signal caller and showcased her talents with some great tosses and quick scampers to avoid the rush. Keith hauled in a couple of TD passes to go along with his bloody shin. Gonna need more than just neosporin on that bad boy, OUCH. Steph helped improve our ever-ailing goal line zone defense with a sweet pass deflection in the endzone. Salty brought the goal line D right back to form by getting torched for the opponent's only score. Billy owned the middle of the field as he hauled in pass after pass. Craig had some nice long QB runs and laid down some punishing D on grey-shorts guy (a.k.a. Pele) who expressed his frustration by kicking the ball, not once, but twice out of the back of the endzone. First time shame on you. Second time seek anger management. There were a few tense moments where unfriendly words were traded between teams, but all in all it was a good night for FBT as they left the field victorious to the cheers of MVB! MVB!

(from Keith) YOU HAD TO SEE IT, TO BELIEVE IT. LUCKY FOR YOU WHO ARE READING THIS, I WAS THERE. THIS GAME STARTED LIKE ANY OTHER, BUT TURNED INTO A NAIL BITTER AT THE VERY END. FBT TOOK THE FIELD LIKE IT WAS JUST ANOTHER ORDINARY GAME, BUT FOR THE CARGILL BLUE IT WAS PAY BACK (PLEASE GO TO GEEKSONTHEWEB.COM AND CLICK ON
SPORTS SCHEDULES AND GO TO FALL THURSDAY FOOTBALL TO SEE WHAT HAPPENED). LAST YEAR FBT BARELY SQUEAKED OUT A WIN, BUT YOU MUST REMEMBER, THAT WAS THE GAME FBT TAILGATED BEFORE THE GAME AND CONSUMED SOME BARELY HOPS AND A COUPLE POUNDS OF HAMBURGERS AND BRATS. ANYWAYS, BACK TO THE GAME.

FBT HAD THE BALL TO START THE FIRST HALF OF PLAY. WITH THE COLONEL TAKING THE HELM, YOU COULD FEEL THE CONFIDIENCE FLOWING THROUGH THE TEAM. THE FIRST DRIVE TURNED OUT TO BE SOMEWHAT PATHETIC. THERE WERE SOME DROPPED BALLS BY THE RECEIVER AND SOME POOR THROWS BY THE QB (SORRY CRAIG, BUT IT WAS THE TRUTH) AND THE DRIVE ENDED ON CB'S 30-YARD LINE. WITH THE BALL IN THEIR HANDS, CB DROVE DOWN THE FIELD AND PUT ONE IN FOR TD. LUCKLY FOR FBT, PAT MADE A GREAT DEFENSE PLAY ON THE EXTRA POINT BY DIVING INFRONT OF HIS MAN AND KNOCKING THE BALL DOWN. THIS LEFT A SOUR TASTE IN FBT'S MOUTH. "NOBODY DRIVES DOWN THE FIELD ON US, SCORES, AND GETS AWAY WITH IT" SCREAMED CRAIG, AS HE HAD EVERYONE HUDDLED UP. "PAT DO A CHAIR AND I WILL HIT YOU DEEP, GIRLS DO
SEVEN AND OUTS, SALTY DO A TEN HOOK IN THE MIDDLE AND BILL DO SPAGETTI!!!" TO NO SURPRISE TO THE FBT FANS, THE PLAY WORKED OUT BEAUTIFLY AND FINALLY THE SOCCER SHIRTS WERE IN FOR A SCORE. WITH A PERFECTLY EXECUTED EVERYONE TO THE LEFT AND SALTY (AT CENTER) GOING RIGHT, THE TWO POINTS CONVERSION WAS GOOD. FBT HAD FINALLY FOUND ITS RYTHM AND SHUT DOWN CB ON THE NEXT DRIVE WITH AN INTERCEPTION FROM BIC (WHO FINALLY REALIZED THAT PLAYING TWO FEET OFF HER OPPONET INSTEAD OF 20 FEET CREATES TURNOVERS) TO END THE HALF. MAKING THE SCORE 8-6.

CARGILL BLUES STARTED OUT THE 2ND HALF ON FIRE. WITH AN EIGHT PLAY DRIVE, DROVE DOWN THE FIELD AND SCORED. THANKFULLY THEY DIDN'T CONVERT THEIR TWO POINT CONVERSION MAKING THE SCORE 8-12. FBT ANSWERED WITH N SIX PLAY DRIVE WHICH INCLUDED A PASS TO EACH RECEIVER AND AN EXTRA PASS TO STEPH WHICH ENDED UP TO BE A SLIDING ON THE KNEES TOWNDOWN. UNFORTIONATELY, FBT WAS UNABLE TO CONVERT THERE 2 POINT CONVERSION BECAUSE CB'S BIG MAN BATTED DOWN A PASS THAT WAS SUPPOSE TO GO TO BILL IN THE CORNER. SO CB GOT THE BALL BACK WITH 5 MINUTES LEFT IN THE GAME WITH THE SCORE 14-12. THEY ONCE AGAIN DROVE DOWN THE FIELD USING THEIR BIG MAN AS THEIR MAIN GO TO GUY. WITH A HIGH PASS OVER THE MIDDLE, CB TOOK THE LEAD WITH ONE MINUNTE LEFT IN THE GAME. THANK GOD FOR PAM'S "THAT'S RIGHT, I'M IN YOUR BACK POCKET" DEFENSE, SHE KNOCKED DOWN THE EXTRA POINT PASS AND GAVE FBT A CHANCE TO WIN THE GAME (it might be noted that Pam "attended" the game in the same fashion Keith did). WITH ONE MINUNTE LEFT AND THEIR OWN BIG MAN ON THE IR LIST, WHAT WAS FBT GOING TO DO? THEY COULDN'T USE THE TIP PLAY THAT HAS WON COUNTLESS GAMES IN THE PAST. CRAIG FINALLY CAME UP WITH A SERIES OF PLAYS THAT COULD ONLY BE DONE WITH A NO HUDDLE OFFENSE. THEY BROKE FROM THE HUDDLE AND BEGAN THE DRIVE TO WIN THE GAME. THE FIRST FOUR PLAYS WORKED TO A TEE. STEPH DOING A 7 AND OUT, BILL DOING A 10 AND OUT, SALT DOING A 5 AND OUT AND BIC DOING A 10 AND OUT AND CATCHING THE BALL AND GOING OUT FO BOUNCE AT CB'S FIVE YARD LINE WITH EIGHT SECONDS ON THE CLOCK. HERE COME THE MOST QUESTIONABLE CALL OF THE GAME. WITH SECONDS LEFT IN THE GAME, CRAIG TAKES THE BALL AND ROLLS RIGHT WITH PAT IN THE CORNER OF THE ENDZONE. HE THROWS IT UP AND PAT DIVES FOR IT AND CATCHES IT. FBT WINS, RIGHT? OH NO, THE REF PLOWS THE WHISTLE AND CALLS PAT OUT OF BOUNDS. CRAIG IS FURIOUS, YELLS AT THE REF, THE REF THROW HIM OUT OF THE GAME AND FBT IS WITHOUT THEIR STAR QB. THE REF EXPLAINS THAT FBT HAS ONE SECOND LEFT AND THAT IT IS A GENDER PLAY. WHAT IS FBT GOING TO DO? WHAT ELSE? HAVE PAM THROW A TD PASS TO "I CAN ONLY CATCH A BALL ON THE RUN BY SLIDING ON MY KNEES" STEPHANIE SCHLICHTING TO WIN THE GAME. FBT WINS THE GAME 20-18. PUT THAT ONE IN THE BOOKS. DONE AND DONE!!!!!

Ugly night for weather and FBT. Gross.

Just wait until Steph's recap next week!

Just in case a recap doesn't come... we won 52-0.

(from Steph - "The Worst Recap Ever - I'm Completely Embarrassed") Without our MVP (AKA Potent P*nis), we started out slow, but lucky for us, early in the game, Billy intercepted the ball on 4th down and then very cleverly stepped out of bounds putting us back at the 30. Later, just as the time ran out at the half, Pat intercepted the ball and ran it in to set the score at 39-0 (or something like that). Whew! No one likes a close game.

The rest is a blur and completely out of order.

Highlights: Keith made some amazing catches - holding onto the ball as he fell in the end zone, catching the ball while he slid on his knees . . . Billy with spaghetti and sometimes with Alfredo, Bic’s catch in the deep right corner (or was it left), Craig with his right on target “did you put in my order?” throws (and tweaking his leg . . . again), Bic’s head-down, full-sprint defense . . . as Craig would say, “Swim between my legs. Can you feel the warmth?” Seriously ended around 60-0.

That’s it. You waited three weeks for THAT. Yuck.

Gotta go . . . it’s play-off time!

(from Bic) Try as we may, we can’t seem to get rid of the stress balls that always undo us in the end. Going into the semi-finals against old rival Cargill Blue, FBT reeked of nervous and lackluster energy worse than Billy’s hasn’t-been-washed-in-eight-games jersey. After trading a couple of touchdowns with Cargill in the beginning of the half, FBT’s offense and defense came to a screeching halt as we battled self doubt, indecision, and a bad case of the drop-sies. While the ref wasn’t as bad as tall, skinny, and light’s-a-little-dim-in-the-attic new boy, he seemed to have trouble keeping track of huddle time (Err, allowing the QB to call a play for each player is a bit much) as well as Cargill’s illegal “secret weapon” (a.k.a. picking, picking, and picking). Film review also revealed that missing our big guy, Keith “I hurt my toe” Bias probably didn’t help. We dropped the game, doomed to relive the yuckiness for the summer. Fortunately, due to a team forfeit, we were asked to play in a second game. Determined to drop-kick the stress ball out of our system, we prepped ourselves with chatter of “Let’s have fun,” “Mix it up,” and more “Let’s have fun.” The talk seemed to work, as Bill (“He looks like a girl” *one second pause* – “OH NO!”) led us on a feast of spaghetti. With his dart-throwing QB technique, Billy led us on multiple TD drives, including a beautiful deep ball to Craig for an amazing fingertip catch and score. And if the hustle didn’t take Craig’s breath away then, Pammy’s “pinpoint” throw that hit him in the “numbers” (read: fruit basket) a few minutes later certainly did. “I hurt my groin” was heard above FBT’s peals of laughter as “Drops-a-Lot” limped off the field. Offense and defense back on track, the universe was back to normal, as we scored at least five times, holding “They’ll be the best team in a couple of years” to one late-game score. Fleeing mosquitoes, FBT headed back to Houlihan’s with $50 worth of gift certificates and hopes for a not-so-sucky dining experience. Meals comprising of loud chatter and laughter, appetizers, Bloody Marys (!), Cranberry Vodkas, and free (Thanks Todd B!) olives, nachos, and mini-yum dessert (for Michelle!) made the night not so shabby. Another season, same old great friends. This is Bic Ngo, Ph.D., reporting for Pat Sukhum, Ph.D., Craig Schlichting, Ph.D., Shon Schulte, Ph.D., Steph Schlichting, Ph.D., Pam Sukhum, Ph.D., Keith Bias, Ph.D., and Bill Nielsen, Ph.D. And out.