This is an ACTUAL resignation by a guy that I worked with. This is the funniest freakin thing I've read. He actually sent it to the CEO of the company too - he's got some balls.

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Subject: Resignation Hardcopy will follow:

Dear Dorian, After a period of deliberation, I regretfully have come to the decision to tender my resignation from Enterpulse, effective June 1, 2001. Please know that I still maintain a high level of respect for you as a manager and colleague, and I thank you sincerely for the support and assistance you have offered me in each of those roles. I have been proud to work for Enterpulse/3MC over the past year; it has been a journey that has provided me with new skills that will enable me to move forward to new and exciting opportunities.

As such, I have decided to become a professional pirate. It has always been a dream of mine to live the life of a swashbuckling corsair, beholden to none and master of all I survey. Once my crew of rogues is assembled, we shall take to the high seas to pursue fortune, fame, and adventure. Our path may not be filled with the leisurely comforts and technological marvels that Enterpulse provides (such as the pool table, free soft drinks, and high speed internet access), but we shall nonetheless move forward to carve a name for ourselves in the annals of history with bold insurgency, death-defying feats, and hair-raising escapes. Once I have a sharp blade at my hip, the Jolly Roger flying high above me, and the sea before me... I believe I will have found my true calling.

Please note that I am currently accepting applications for First Mate, if you are at all interested in applying. I will provide a full medical and dental plan, which will offer immediate coverage of all maladies other than scurvy and the occasional bout of rickets.

Godspeed,
Michael Sukovich